Days is Not So F*ckin Perfect ~by Pink

Chloe has hit a new level of crazy!! On a scale of 1 to 10 she is at a 76. The lady is one step short of boiling a bunny and putting it in Daniel's kitchen...and it might be Melanie's bunny. She even has Maggie of all people worried. Maggie has hid all the kitchen knives and is probably throwing out all cleaning fluids. What happened to the smart Chloe who was Ghoul Girl, and who eventually was able to charm any man she wanted? To quote Black Swan...SHE'S GONE! Chloe is just another Days female who falls into the "I am now pathetic and will do anything to keep my man" category. It's sickening. I am not even a feminist and it pisses me off. Do I expect Daniel to take her back? Of Course not but it DOES ANNOY me the way he reported her to child services. That is not how you handle someone like her, he should have gotten her help if he loves her so much. Helping her does not mean getting back together with her you butthead! P.S. though I love a good prescription...giving her sleeping pills IS NOT THE BEST IDEA.

Kate is trying to win the Grandma of the Year award....Please stop and stick to ruining your own kids lives. Let the Grandkids just get presents. Just chill with Stefano and worry about what he is up to, nothing else.

EJ/Rafe/Sami/Nicole....Having a baby might be less painful than watching them. I just can't. Rafe's double better be more interesting than he is because I can only take so much. EJ and Nicole's reunion is great, but knowing that TAYLOR is on her way (Nicole's half sister) makes me want to gag, but I will remain open minded....for now.

Bo/Hope/Carly/Jennifer/Dr.Ben/Warden.....END IT ALREADY!! Okay we get it you steal organs and you make money....can we clear this up already? Jennifer is in trouble...the kind of trouble she is in...which I will not spoil here...IS RIDICULOUS and makes being possessed by the devil more realistic! Also, once this is over Bo picks between Hope and Carly...finally!! Again I won't give it away but let's just say he prefers Chicken wings to Chicken breast if you catch my drift....okay I gave it away sorry!

Adrienne and Justin.....They had sex. I wish I had more to say but I haven't seen them for months and that's all that happened. It wasn't that good but I am proud of them for doing it in the middle of the day at least.

Other stuff: Melanie...you are pregnant but that doesn't mean you can be obnoxious, knock it off. Brady.....take your shirt off. Chad.....you are a DiMera, shut up! Will.....you are gay. Gaby.....Will is GAY.

February SUCKS Instead of Sweeps

Sooo my comments on this week's DOOL and upcoming storylines for February sweeps. WARNING: there may ARE spoilers.

Melanie claims she is done with Phillip and decides to keep the baby. My first question really is why were the Days writers insistent upon not having Melanie get an abortion? Would it have been so wrong? Melanie and Carly could have discussed why SHE didn't get an abortion, Maggie could have taken her, etc. etc. Melanie ends up losing the baby so there is no real reason why she couldn't have had one. P.S if Nathan is leaving she needs to get with Brady. I fully understand what Mark Hapka was referring to when he made his statement about leaving the show. The Mate fans got completely jerked around. I am not even a huge Mate fan and I even recognize this. They never got the chance to get back together. They throw in a baby and it stops a reconciliation, only to have Melanie lose the baby down the line. MAKES NO SENSE.

Chloe is going bat shit crazy. Yes its Caroline's fault and I cant watch that woman get attacked for an eternity. However, the writers should just make Chloe a villain. It would be far more interesting if she was a bitchy ass drunk always shooting off at the mouth like Nicole. Her becoming needy and desperate after Daniel leaves her....just ANOTHER example of how WEAK the women are on this show. Stephanie's speech after Nathan left her gave me hope she'd improve as a character, but alas Shelley is leaving the show. Shelley had to put up with the WORST dialogue ever and she deserves credit for sticking around as long as she did. I think she will be successful when she ends up somewhere where she is appreciated and valued.

Jay (Phillip) is also leaving....I'M DEVASTATED, however I was expecting this because Jay had been wanting to leave. The real scary thing about Mark, Shelley, and Jay leaving is HOW they will leave, who will be RECAST, and how Days plans to SCREW IT UP!

Bo and Hope are still boring. They are getting back together. There is your amazing spoiler because it was not clear at all that this was going to happen. Righttttttt. So what's next for Carly? Well half the town hates her, she got no man, her kid is like leave me alone.....I'm guessing either bag lady or coke head.

Sami/Rafe/EJ/Nicole......I really don't give a crap. The new storyline is a reboot that I could live without. Rafe and his doppelganger...WTF, I give up on these 4 with the exception of Nicole because at least she is funny. Kate and Stefano should kidnap them all and then torture them for torturing us. Maybe Brady can help them and start beating them all up while shirtless. Or stick them on a island with Vivian and her manboy Gus.

Maggie and Victor are getting closer to being together...YES!! Caroline is still alive and kicking...NO!!

Finish up the damn organ crap because no one cares anymore, Dr. Ben is gross and pointless, and Jennifer apparently needs saving by Daniel. I'm not sure how I feel about Jen/Daniel pairing btw, I have to wait and see. Although I find it amazing he will be paired with someone his own damn age for a change.

Have a good weekend and at least say "ARGGGG" once in honor of Johnny "Kickass" DiMera!! Most fun character on the show! And if you have ANY questions about the show/spoilers, hit me up on twitter. @HotMessMandy

Petition to Kill Off Kayla

Johnny's cancer storyline is depressing. I don't mind cancer storylines but here is my issue with this one. While it is important to draw awareness to all kinds of cancer, can there at least be a level of respect to present as much ACCURACY to the way a disease actually IS. I also don't like that the writers are using it as an attempt to get the audience to like EJ...guess what it's not really working! I'm sick of the kids on Days getting these horrible stories where they are either killed off or made to suffer. Yes children suffer in real life, however this is getting too repetitive with TORTURING children.

Melanie is preggo! If Stephanie is pregnant too let's just send the writing team diapers!

Stefano and Kate back together!! YAY!! Now can we get more Maggie and Victor is the real question!

Kayla is still alive...I'm hoping this status update changes eventually. She tried to get Carly fired for really no good reason whatsoever considering her kid and her mother were behind the whole thing. Another character assassination that is GOING NOWHERE and ruining another powerful female character. So they made Carly a total wimp and pushover and now Kayla is a major..sorry..CUNT! She is!

I'm reaching the point where Mark Hapka may be better off pursuing outside projects where he is USED, given GOOD SCRIPTS, and is APPRECIATED!

P.S. I've said Will and Chad are gay from the beginning....guess what...Still VERY GAY! I encourage Days to at least attempt the same sex pairing since they have great chemistry.

P.S.S. Stefano being behind the organ thing...LAME AND CLICHE! It would have been funnier if it was Chloe!.

Hapka's Hos the Fight Is ON!

Okay I'm going to start this off with my feelings regarding Mark Hapka's firing. I love Mark, and he along with other actors on the show are getting shafted for OTHER storylines people honestly do not care for. He wanted more of a story and they gave him nothing to work with, so in my opinion he is BETTER OFF! Mark is a great actor and they gave him nothing with Nathan. Anytime we saw Nathan it was puppy dog eyes and him just pining after Melanie, while sleeping with Steph. Nathan and Melanie never happened really, and there wasn't even a hint of them getting a shot. Excuse my language but basically the writers have been dicking us around for the past couple of years. I wish Mark the best and I think we all know he is really going to do great things.

Mark's firing though points out what I have been saying about the days writing staff..THEY CANNOT CUT IT! They introduce stories/characters and then never follow through. When they do follow through the writing is stale, recycled, and no one cares. Everytime there is something positive on the show, it's ruined within a weak. What is the strongest coupling on the show right now: arguable Victor and Maggie. How much of them have we seen really? They get about an episode a week IF that much. I understand some stories are CENTRAL and some are Back burner however, and this is a big HOWEVER...the CENTRAL stories are sucking as of late. My point: GET RID OF THE PROBLEM IN THE WRITING DEPARTMENT. Also, if you are in a firing mood, get rid of the DEAD WEIGHT you call actors on your show when you do nothing with them or they stand around as annoying fillers we don't care about.

END of RANT!

As for a recap of the week: What really happened? Nicole and EJ got engaged...great we are back to where we started with these two. Rafe and Sami...still as annoying as ever. Melanie alone. Nathan about to be alone. Stephanie alone. Phil alone.... with Chloe and a baby. Daniel alone. Brady alone but working with Kate. Carly alone and acting like a pathetic hot mess. Kayla and Caroline judgemental bitching. Bo and Hope: the love story continues. Yes this spells out a FABULOUS soap opera right now. Dear Days and NBC, FIX your SHIT! If you can't get it together you will lose your audience.

Happy New Year...Now Where Are the Good Storylines?

Okay sorry I missed a blog from last week. I had the sore throat from hell...I blame Caroline, and what the hell Carly too.

So the big baby reveal happened and everyone pretty much blamed Carly. Okay, I am not a fan of the "new" Carly that the writers destroyed but how is it this woman's fault? Is this like an inside joke now or something because I just don't get it? Pretty soon everyone will be hitting her with sticks just for fun. Molly Burnett gave her best performance ever when she learns Phil cheated with Chloe. Melanie's reaction wasn't her usual breakdown, it was more a cool calm collected evil bitch turn that was amazing. Melanie being mad at Carly is the only person who has a right to be. Is Melanie right to blame her mom, of course not, like I said NOT Carly's fault, HOWEVER Melanie is in a place where she can no longer trust anyone except the two people who NEVER hurt her: Maggie and Daniel. At this rate, Melanie/Carly should just avoid each other, Maggie is Melanie's real mom anyway, in the ways that matter.

Chloe made the fastest getaway on heels ever, but actually Father Matt got out of the Church first so his move was more impressive. Chloe didn't really get yelled at yet, but her and Daniel are now "over". Phil and Melanie are "over" now too, but whatever one of these couples is getting back together sooner than we'd think. I think Chloe is more upset she has to change Parker's diapers alone. Daniel is sad, but for some reason I have no sympathy for him. Chloe cheated on you like she did on Lucas with you, YA BIG MORON! I'm just excited Kate is a GRANDMA again and is forced to have Chloe in her life. If Kate poisons tanning lotion, I think she'd finally succeed in killing Chloe.

Sami and Rafe.....EJ and Nicole....wow what to say? I find the four of them to be SO BORING NOW! I'm sick of their shit that has been going on for three or four years now. I DO NOT like Rafe at all! He is a walking ape with no appeal and he makes absolutely no sense. If the writers would only give Galen SOMETHING to work with instead of "oh let me save Sami once again" crap! He really is Roman all over again, but now I'd like to speed up to the part where he is replaced by a John character! EJ is a complete asshole that I don't even pay attention anymore. Nicole is crying over a baby for ANOTHER YEAR that is STILL NOT HERS! Nicole is a great character and now she is getting shit on! And Sami.....I don't even know where to start so I'm not going to!

Where are Maggie and Victor? The best storyline on the show and the couple is barely on. When something is going good, and people enjoy the writing and the acting what you do Days writing staff is PUT THEM ON THE DAMN AIR! USE YOUR POSITIVES!

On to the Negative...Let's hope Caroline comes out of that "good" stroke she suffered and then gets in a car with Kayla and drives off a cliff. When I was young I LOVED the Bradys...now I want them all to get over themselves and die. Let's look at the Brady women...Caroline (sanctimonious bitch), Kayla (judgemental, intrusive bitch, Stephanie (weak ass pathetic bitch), and Samantha (self-destructive bitch who is NEVER wrong). These are the people I'm supposed to like? Yeah not going to happen. Also Days' writers, if you are going to bring back characters that people liked, you DO NOT DESTROY THE CHARACTER COMPLETELY! Kayla was never as bad as she is now. This ends my rant.....for now.

All I Want for Xmas Is A GOOD STORYLINE

Johnny is missing an eye. It is sad and it wasn't necessary. The sick kid storyline is a cop out and made EJ out to be a complete monster, blaming cancer on Sami. I understand EJ is jealous of Rafe/Sami, but taking it out on his children is gross, wrong, and honestly out of character. The writers made him way worse than he was. Like I said on twitter, this is unfair to the EJami fans who support the couple. Before the Safes start with me, your couple is getting shit on too. Rafe and Sami have been married like a week and they are already fighting like they old and they are not really being romantic. In fact they have reached a level of boredom where Allie cries every night because she'd like something to happen....she's that bored.

Maggie still wants Victor...they are going to drag this out. JUST HAPPEN ALREADY! Meanwhile can we stick Vivian back in the sarcophagus? She's just being cruel and not at all funny. It isn't fun anymore when she just randomly tortures people and screws with their lives. STOP IT! Go find Ivan and get laid! Also leave Brady and Nicole alone. Just because you aren't having sex doesn't mean you have to ruin it for everyone else!

Hope and Bo are on the run. Usually these kinds of storylines are entertaining but somehow these two know how to BORE UP a story! Feed Hope, stick her in jail, and then get her released like you would in REAL LIFE. She figured out there is an organ harvesting thing going on, let her out for THAT, not because she is in solitary and crying. DO YOUR JOB BO! P.S. wearing all black....BIG TIP YOU ARE HIDING SOMETHING OR SOMEONE. Also, I'm beginning to think the Hope not eating thing is a running gag with the writers. Rude! She's thrown away food like 8 times in the past 3 weeks. Enough already!

Spoilers for the NEW YEAR: Kayla opens her big mouth and reveals Parker's paternity. The woman never learned to shut the fuck up and this is all Stephanie and Caroline's fault. Speaking of Caroline...STROKE! Apparently the writers read my play by play and realized she also needs to shut the fuck up. Rafe is getting a new brother...I already don't like him because that family is boring. Nicole's sister is coming back and falls for EJ...maybe she has a serial killer fetish too. YAY! What happened to Chad btw? Where is he when he is not stalking Stefano? I'd like Johnny to get his eye too. He ain't Patch HE COOLER!

Merry Xmas everyone, and have a great Holiday without the soap style drama. Tell your husband he is NOT the father. Sleep with your Son in law! If you like women....Sleep with someone like CHLOE! If your a guy...Sleep with someone like CHLOE. I'm sticking Chloe in all your stockings!! Run to the hospital and pray a hot doctor is there. Run over a lady like Caroline. FEED HOPE! Take care!!

Caroline Got Run Over By a Reindeer

I think this is my favorite title because I partially wish it was true, but I happen to care for Reindeer. Caroline and Stephanie need to shut the fuck up! There is no nicer way to put it. They just keep loud whispering everyday. Caroline also had the nerve to do a terrible Melanie impersonation. I guess she doesn't realize doing an impression of her would mean attaching a bungee cord to their faces. I don't want to spoil storyline but at least Caroline will be shutting up soon. Too bad she can't take Stephanie with her.

Hope is still in jail.......not eating........bruised face.......I stopped caring three months ago. Seriously just have Bo and Jen go save her so they ruin Carly's life because delaying the inevitable is just annoying. They have Carly in camouflage now...next will be a burlap sack and a bag on her head. Maybe they can make Carly interesting again if they have her kill Dr. Ben. I'll pay her to do it.

EJ is a rat bastard now, probably at his worst in all his years on the show. Seriously Days writers...THIS IS NOT HOW YOU WRITE A VILLAIN. EJ has nothing redeemable about him right now. They should have given him cancer instead of Johnny. Giving EJ cancer would have made him vulnerable and the audience, or EJAMIs at least would like him. Serioulsy I am not an EJAMI fan, but if I was I would seriously be furious with the writers lately. They've made EJ into a piece of shit human being. He is even mistreating his children now and that is a low blow. Also, I am not a fan of giving Johnny a tumor. Johnny is MY FAVORITE kid on the show and now they are making him sick. THEY HAVE RUINED CHRISTMAS!

Chloe and Phillip are still covering up the fact they had sex. Phillip is now lying that he slept with his random co-worker Sabrina. Daniel needs to go to the store and buy a freaking clue! While he is there he should pick one up for Melanie too. This rhymed! Best part of this week was the PHLOE flashback to when Chloe was a normal human being called GHOUL GIRL. That was the Chloe I loved who was actually smart but apparently she took all of Brady's drugs offscreen and came back with a learning disability. Side Note: Baby Parker is played by two cute little girls. Maybe the character will have gender issues! This I do know...one of those little girls has the hots for Eric Martsolf, and she has good taste.

My Xmas wish: a MAGIC CHRISTMAS. Best couple on the show and I want them together already. Can I get a romantic slow dance please? And I will also pay to see Victor in a Christmas sweater thank you!