Pet Cemetery Passions

The GOOD News: EJ woke up. The BAD News: He is pretending that he is married to Sami and cannot remember anything else. BOOOOOOO! This is boring and Rafe only makes it worse with his stupid ass theories that Will shot EJ. Even after Sami informs Rafe that Stefano has proof Will did not do it, Rafe is convinced Will did it and the evidence will pile up. Rafe is a F&*^ING MORON! Yes I censored myself because ten bucks says Rafe wouldn't figure out the word I used. Of course no one will tell EJ the truth because Lexie thinks she knows what she is doing and the truth will kill EJ. WHATEVER!

Chloe continued breaking up with Nicole and acted like a mean girl to her. She tells her that she has no friends and that she doesn't feel safe with her. Apparently these two were secretly having sex and we were avoiding the truth. Nicole goes to visit her dead dog Pookie. I wish Pookie could have lived longer and Rafe could have died instead. Annnnnyyywayyyyss, Nicole overhears Brady moving "Sparkles" aka Isabella's body from the pet cemetery. French Stewart is guest starring which is kind of weird in an "I'm surprised they didn't write an alien storyline" for him kind of way. Status of Vivian: Still in Coffin, has eaten more than Hope who is in jail, and still has to pee.

Nathan talks about how he dislikes Chloe with Daniel, which leads Carly to believe Nathan and Chloe had the affair. Ewwwwwwwww! To make matters worse, Kayla is back to annoy the crap out of Stephanie and Stephanie reveals the whole baby test switch to her mother. Kayla goes on a huge lecture about what Stephanie is doing is wrong and how sad Steph is for being so desperate. Stephanie then decides to throw a hissy fit and start screaming, but nonetheless she is a pathetic hot mess. Stephanie and Nathan are becoming so pathetic that they might actually deserve each other just not on my screen! P.S. Daniel is catching Rafe's stupidity disease, and Chloe needs to tell Carly that she dresses and does her hair badly if she were REALLY her BFF!