One Rafe to Frisk

Hope wants to go to prison.....Well then, LET's LET HER! The woman weighs 8 pounds, and maybe time in the slammer will give her a weight gain. Her hair is bigger than her! Her rib cage itself being THAT visible is a crime. Julie and Bo try to talk her out of giving herself up, but she insists on going to jail. Bo talks to her lawyer and interferes of course. ASSHOLES! Let the thin freak go to jail where she belongs for two months! Ciara is better off not seeing her skeletal mother.

Melanie is getting choked to death and Nathan saves her. Actually Nathan shoves the guy and ends up hurting is elbow. He proceeds to whine about it for the entire episode. Melanie probably could have taken the guy, and we wouldn't have to hear Nathan complain. On a side note: Nathan is having a good Mark Hapka hair day. He even showered leaving his hair in that messy funk that I approve of. Stephanie is still with that chick Ian, who know has his or her hair in a ponytail. He hacks into the hospital computers for her but the test results are not ready, and Stephanie cannot believe it. Had the poor bastard figured it out he or she could have gotten laid. Nathan tells Stephanie about the attack on Melanie, and she could really care less. That was nice.

Daniel overhears Carly and Chloe talking about getting together the next day. Chloe tells him Carly is taking her out for her birthday. Wow, so somehow Chloe manages to not only lie but work in a present as well. You go girl! They repeat themselves and pretend to be friends in front of Daniel the entire episode. Way to waste a whole hour! Melanie stops by and the parents see her strangled neck. They smother her and she tells them to back off. Chloe and Carly are still going to meet up for the paternity test fun. Can Chloe take Carly clothes shopping instead? PLEASE?!

Lexie comes over and finds out that EJ and Sami are engaged. She is also really thankful the writers remember she exists and let her out of her secret cave in Never Neverland. Lexie is Stefano's daughter, you would think she'd get more screentime. She only comes out for emergency surgery and weddings/funerals. Stefano plays nice with Sami, who is shocked but accepts the peace offering. What hell is this show taking place in? I only like Stefano and Sami fights, not hugfests!! EJ and Sami are being gross as usual, but luckily something even more gross is going on. Rafe comes to Nicole's rescue when she gets accosted by a porn fan. He gets rid of the guy and buys Nicole booze. He is in her heart already!! Nicole is suspicious and even frisks Rafe. It was kind of hot but Nicole can do better than Rafe of all people. Hopefully these two are really drunk with the crappy dialogue they had to say. If Nicole and Rafe have sex....Ewwwwww!

Previews: Hope tells the judge she is guilty. Force feed her your honor!! That should be her punishment. She should have to gain 80 pounds. If you don't want to do that then I say death penalty all the way for trying to kill a cop!

Arianna yells at Rafe that he is out of his freakin' mind. Okay it would be kind of funny if Nicole became Arianna's sister in law, but since she is leaving we will never see that. Think of the Spanish fighting!!

EJ and Sami make out. Use protection...in fact....think of Caroline. That always ruins the mood for me.