Wednesday, June 30, 2010

The Rehashing and the Restless

DAY 224 of Chloe/Daniel watch is in effect. She STILL won't tell him the truth. Baby Sydney will be 25 by the time she tells Daniel she cheated. Carly stays out of it, after she wanted to butt in for the 118th time. Nicole tells Chloe to fight back, but to chill out with the cray cray eyes and the acting a fool. Nicole is already questioning why she is friends with Chloe. Daniel is just very WTF about everything. He asks Chloe again what she is lying about but we get NOTHING! He was too deaf to even hear her screaming about cheating, and Chloe is too busy calling Carly a bitch to realize her dress is ugly.

Rafe wants Arianna to fire EJ. Then she has to explain to him that when people are in jail, they hire things called lawyers to help them when their good for nothing FBI connected brothers can't get them out of jail. EJ later on calls Rafe impotent, which MIGHT be true considering he slept with Sami during her fertile years and NOTHING. Maybe he was sneaky and wore protection? Rafe walks up on Nicole talking to Dick on the phone at the end of the show. Which means he either heard her...OR...Rafe is going to waste our time for another two months.

Phillip tells Melanie all about Pocket storyline. She looked as disinterested and UNAMUSED as I did years ago. WHO NAMES A KID POCKET? That just proves Kayla and Patch are not fit to raise children. Pocket is off living it up under his birth name Tyler THANK GOD! Phillip should at least win an award for parents for getting his original name back. Also love how Phillip was READY to be a dad to Claire but not this kid, WHATEVER still annoyed! Anyway this is setting up Phillip to be the dad, so GAG me. Mel and Phil decide to have kids when the time is right....preferably when she is old enough to not spaz out.

Shane tells Kimberly he has resigned from the ISA ...Salem's version of the CIA but more secret and they always get themselves caught. Kimberly with her melodramatic foot stomping reads the paper, and Shane seems to convince her that he wants to stay with her and be with his family. Mr. Sheffield would be proud.

EJ tells Sami he loves her again. Sami gives EJ the we are just friends speech.....who do it occasionally. EJ calls her out for being a lying pain in the ass, which causes turns Sami on apparently. The whole show was Sami panting at EJ and turning him down, via asthma attack?! She was seriously breathing harder than a Biggest Loser contestant after a Jillian Michael's workout. The kinky Days music, her panting, and EJ whispering with that accent equaled a Days of Our Lives EJAMI ORGASM. Was it sexier than a sex scene? YES....did it accomplish anything between them? NO! However I needed a glass of water like Ali Sweeney did after he was done with her.

Previews: Madeline tells Kate that if she tells Stefano the secret, lives will be destroyed. I love destroyed lives...especially when they are secrets that I have exposed MONTHS AGO! The real cliffhanger...what will Stefano call Chad after he finds out its his kid...Chad just doesn't have a Italian ring to it and there is no nickname. DAMN!

EJ tells Arianna that one false move and then they have her. By the time Nicole makes a false move Arianna will be getting a lethal injection for mugging annoying men in town. Send the bitch back to jail, maybe a second trip will make her more interesting because the first time didn't really work.

Nicole asks what is EJ up to? Stop talking to yourself, and stop talking to Chloe. You want to know what EJ is up to...HE TOLD YOU! He is looking for PROOF that you are guilty...STOP WONDERING!

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

My General Hospital Visit Day!

Okay I'm sorry I cannot post today's recap. I was unable to watch because of a doctor's appointment, and then additional tests. Please feel free to comment if you'd like to about today's episode. I'm sleepy and I CANNOT do it! LOL. My apologies again!

HOT MESS! xoxo.... totally was one today.

Monday, June 28, 2010

Bill and the Beautiful Flashbacks

The Hortons are still celebrating Alice's life and we got some more flashbacks of Frances Reid in action. Great moments and some characters said goodbye today. It was nice seeing some of them, and some should really STAY IN TOWN because we like them better than certain other Salem people!

Kate wonders if she should tell Stefano about what Maddie's big secret is....can she not tell us already? Do we have to find out along with Stefano because I just need to here that I am right already. Kate goes to Alice's grave and talks about her life regrets. It was very sweet and I enjoy seeing the softer side of Sears..I mean Kate. Bill, who SHOULD STAY IN SALEM, comes up and the two have a small chat, but he is leaving...SHOOT. Maddie is trying to hide from Chad she got rid of that little Ho Mia, but I say bow down AND THANK YOU! I would have helped fund Mia's trip out of town. Will mentions her to Maggie and by the looks on their faces, they don't mind that she is gone either. Chad is sad, and Maddie meets up with Kate. Hopefully they TELL US already what we know...PROSTITUTES.

Shane tries to reconnect with Kimberly. Okay wow I'd like to be warned next time about the amount of screaming Kim is going to do. She just yells and lectures Shane the whole time. Why does he want her back? Shane isn't giving up, and if I were him I'd move back to New York with Fran Fine because at least she was funny annoying.

Then this became the Bo and Hope show. They make me want to puke right now with their looks and weird touching. Just get back together already and make each other miserable as usual. Kayla even butts in because she knows all about love with a one eyed dude. Bo takes her off the mugging case and Hope flips out, making her want to stab Bo in the head...okay I added that last part. Dick figures out Hope will be going after Bo next...well she KIND OF TOLD YOU GENIUS! Her little creeper child is coloring with Theo and tells him all about the wallets and strange man. Hope comes in and yells LIES! What great parenting!!! I hate that I have to be on the devil's spawn side of this argument. She runs to her father cause she realizes he is the sane one.

Rafe is back in Salem........Normally this would be exciting.....but NO! He goes to see Sami and tells her about how he wasted his time for about 3 months of storyline. He lectures her as usual and goes on and on about her living arrangement. When she calls him out for being jealous he decides the best answer to this is to make out with her. Okay these two are so boring right now. Just have your little sex with EJ and then regret it without getting pregnant already!

Chloe tells Daniel she has something to say to him. Which means we will get an hour of her NOT saying anything because Daniel will stall her and she will get nervous and say nothing and have the SAME conversation with Carly as always. DUH!

Kate tells Madeline she knows everything. I don't think Kate knows EVERYTHING! I mean why is the sky blue Kate...or your hair for that matter? Just tell us already because it is not like they are going to tell Stefano right away or anything.

Rafe tells EJ, that If that's not good enough for him, he can go to hell. Um WHATEVER! Also, Salem is hell right now! Actually hell is more fun and less time consuming.

Friday, June 25, 2010

Loving Frances Reid!

Okay today we said goodbye to Frances Reid. It would have been a better send off had it been an Alice Centered episode and NOT a Hope centered episode. It was very annoying that everything revolved around Hope, and not Alice like we were promised. I'm even annoyed there were Rafe scenes today.

Everyone got a chance to say goodbye. Mike was annoyed because Lexie would not discharge him for the funeral. So annoyed he chose to scream like a banshee! He even upset Jen! Everyone's goodbyes were sweet, but Hope was given the big "Days of Our Lives" speech. Hope and how she belongs with Bo should never have been mentioned. Should have been ALL ALICE! thanks!

Flashbacks were wonderful, and ALMOST made me cry but I held it in. Think Days did a good job building up Alice's memorial, however many things should have been handled differently. All in all let's remember all the good Frances Reid brought to our show! Have donut in honor of Mrs. H!

Thursday, June 24, 2010

NYC Passions

Okay I DID NOT watch today's episode nor do I feel the need to watch on SoapNet today, but feel free to discuss it amongst yourselves. Spent the day in NYC with family instead and I think I made the right decision.

Pretty much the whole episode is about getting the arrangements for Alice's funeral. Kimberly comes back and its Brady and Horton time the whole episode. Also, having read the previews for this episode I was really annoyed with the mentions of Carly. Okay, seriously, Carly Manning 2.0 while NOT a very likable character lately, DOES NOT deserve to be dissed the day that Alice Horton dies. Alice liked Carly, its a FACT, and I feel its rude to discuss how a character DOES NOT belong at her funeral. This isn't a time when Carly is our main focus and to point out she doesn't belong at the funeral...its RUDE! You can dislike her next week once the funeral is over. It makes NO SENSE to point out how much a character is disliked when the REAL focus should be on the Alice Horton memorial.

Whatever..that is my rant for today.


Shane tells Rafe that his problem is he can't stop thinking about her. Her being Sami of course and I hope all this thinking does not injure Rafe. No his real problem is the fact he is in love with a baby making moron who always does something stupid.

Carrie tells Sami that if she has feelings for Rafe and EJ, she has to decide between them. I say sleep with the British guy and don't get pregnant, and then sleep with Rafe and then smother him with a pillow. Then find a new guy to sleep with who isn't boring or mean and DO NOT GET PREGNANT!

Hope tells Bo she doesn't think she can make it through this day. Going to guess she has not eaten......anyone agree? I say hook her up to an IV pole and then she might turn that frown upside down.

Wednesday, June 23, 2010

Guiding Mia the Hell Out of Salem

Okay Obama preempted my Days of Our Lives but it was clearly to save me from watching this episode. So I am just going to recap the facts and not get to into detail on scenes I did not see. If I left anything out you wanted to say..feel free to leave a comment.

Alice passes away by the end of the episode. Days prolonged her death scene so long that the east coast didn't get to see it because of the Obama coverage. People can agree or disagree with Days' treatment of the Frances Reid memorial. I love the Alice flashbacks, however as far as her death is concerned, I did not care for the way Days wrote it at all. They didn't write her death well, but the incorporation of older characters has been lovely. However, AGAIN....badly written but this is Days after all.

Carrie is back in town and she apologizes for her mother kidnapping Sydney. Why she has to apologize for idea really. I liked when Carrie and Sami hated each other, and this was way to friendly a conversation. Now because of Alice's health being worse they decide let's be friends. WHATEVER. If this was the case then why didn't Marlena and Alice "dying" the first time do this?

Madeline talks Mia into leaving town by getting her into the FAME school she could never ever get into herself because she has no talent and fails as a human being. The ho just went from whore to self serving whore. Go literally GO MIA. Leave! Madeline deserves a medal for getting rid of the Taylor Swift wannabe. Mia says goodbye to Sami and Will...unfortunately they don't really care and forgot about her already.

Nicole asks Brady to help save her job.....BORING! Waste of talent too. Brady is not even shirtless. I say she asks him to take his shirt off because THAT is the real favor she should be asking. He says he and Arianna are over...I don't care, as long s Ethan and Theresa are still together. Brady suggests Nicole do a feature story on Alice Horton. Okay while Alice's passing is important news, I cannot see Nicole actually caring. Over at the prison EJ goes on and on about how Nicole is responsible and he is going to take care of her.

Mike arrives in town but he is involved in a car accident so he cannot get to Alice's bedside in time to say goodbye. You know these people should have visited more or at least FICTIONALLY visited more. Carrie and Jennifer rush to Mike's bedside when he winds up in the hospital, and Lexie even gets to make an appearance because after all she is a doctor and does work there.

Carly interrupts the wedding...AGAIN! Chloe is going to go even more crazy with the amount of times Carly gets up in her business. So the big news that I called as soon as the sex went down: CHLOE IS PREGNANT! Now I don't really like this story because it's a huge cliche and Chloe isn't really maternal in my eyes but whatever. I've been asked who I think the daddy is. My GUESS, this is not a spoiler, is that it is Phillip's because Phil has been in this situation before and he WAS NOT the father. It usually works out that the time you don't want the's yours. If it IS Daniel's well then...that's a wee bit boring unless we get a MIX UP story line AGAIN.

Previews: Sami tells Carrie that when she finds her she's gonna make sure she pays for what she did. Gee wonder if they are talking about Anna. HMMM who cares?! Would Anna really go to jail for that long on this show? Plus it's all EJ's fault anyway.

Shane tells Rafe that the reports of his death are greatly exaggerated.....well since you are alive then DUH! Who wrote that line? I mean really?! This Kimberly and Shane reunion better be short and sweet.

Kimberly tells Bo that he dropped off the face of the earth. God there are so many people I wish she were talking about besides Shane. Can there be a Days Survivor edition where we vote people off for weeks/months/years at a time?!

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

All My Alice Memories.

The Hortons remember Alice some more and await the arrival of Mike Horton. They also try making Alice's donuts and that's a big NO NO in my eyes, but they also put together a family album filled with photos. Caroline, Kayla, and Stephanie also remember Alice and how amazing she was, and how family is important. Which is funny considering Kayla is never around her family and is about to leave again.

Melanie and Chloe have big girl time filled with death threats and tender moments. Melanie calls Chloe one of the Kardashian sisters...the tranny looking one who is a bitch...and says she will CRUSH her. The fact that Melanie thinks she can take Chloe in a fight is fabulous, and at least she is not as annoying as Carly with her same threat over and over again. Melanie should really bitch slap Chloe. The next time the subject of Phillip comes up they should also comment on having both seen him naked. That's real bonding. She lets Chloe borrow the necklace Daniel gave her...with emphasis on the word BORROW! If Chloe doesn't return it after the ceremony she is getting tackled.

Lucas apologizes to Phillip, and his brother hopes he stays in town. He also has a friendly moment with his mother despite the fact he has been cold towards her in the past. He also tells Will that he does not like that he is living with the DiMeras. Well I ENJOY his bonding with Stefano, especially since Stefano should be bonding with Chad.

Daniel gets Phillip and Melanie back to the hospital for the wedding. These two have gone to that hospital way too many times in one day. Just stay there and wait for these two idiots to decide they are not getting married. They are also getting married by a justice of the peace whose name is Kevin but really his name is Jessie from 90210. Jessie gets a phone call and has to leave....ten bucks says it was that damn Andrea Zuckerman. Daniel and Chloe have the 900th conversation about NOT getting married but decide to do it. UGHHHH. Carly finally gets out of surgery and realizes that Chloe lied...OMG why is she so surprised?! She goes in and interrupts the ceremony..AGAIN which is rude because she was NOT invited! Phillip is annoyed and Chloe wants to have a heart attack. Carly is going to say what she needs to say...yeah no she's not..Chloe's pregnant and she continues to annoy this cray cray bitch to no end.

Kate discovers Madeline's secret, but does not share it with us because that would be to nice of this show to do for a change. Stefano agrees to give Madeline all the other stuff she wants back, why that is so confuses the hell out of me. Kate even questions him but he says he doesn't want Maddie in his life anymore. The old Stefano would have taken that stuff and blackmailed into doing his bidding. Chad tells Maddie he is staying in Salem...damn that MIA! Chad visits Mia and tells her his decision. Okay so he stayed in town to have sex with the ho....And Maddie shows up to see Mia to end that idea. Even Maddie knows you can't trust condoms in Salem.

Previews: Carrie is BACK! I miss the old Sami and Carrie bitch fights that Carrie always backed down from and Sami never won somehow. Now they are going to be all friendly and its just not the same. I need a good hair pulling match from these two but I'm not going to get it.

EJ tells Arianna that Nicole is behind everything and he is going to prove it. Good luck with that. Rafe has a better shot of coming back and stumbling upon the truth and even that is a slim to none chance.

Brady tells Nicole that he and Arianna are through. Awww I'm going to miss all of their sex scenes. Too bad that Brady isn't going to get with Nicole either. He is just going to mope around. He should watch Passions in his downtime and try to fix things.

Monday, June 21, 2010

One Sex Tape to Watch

Alice is near death. That's all I really have to say on the matter. Lucas is back and already giving Sami a hard time. He reunites with the Horton family and I love how they pretend like they really included Lucas in the family. WHATEVER.

Kate and Stefano watch the tape from Madeline's safe deposit box. SEX TAPE!! Stefano's eyes are falling out of his head. I find it funny they are so interested in the tape when THEY WERE IN THE DAMN ROOM with her! Basically they killed the dude when he got fresh with Madeline. BTW I loved the fact they didn't show faces on the tape because there is no way in hell to make them all look young. The voice overs were hysterical though. Stefano meets Maddie on the PIER! He tells Madeline she can't blackmail him any more. I'm surprised she got away with it for this long anyway. It takes Kate an entire episode to go through Maddie's box...The women on this show have a thing for boxes. Kate discovers something shocking... birth certificate? paternity test? It's paper though and not a photo. Gee I wonder if has to do with Chad?! I will say I TOLD YOU SO later on. You'll see.

Nathan and Melanie talk. Unfortunately. He tells her she is right to not really enjoy Chloe and her father's impending nuptials. Stephanie shows up before he can tell her more. This just gets better and better. He plans a date with Steph, WHILE HIS GREAT GRANDMOTHER IS DYING, for a hot air balloon ride. I love a good throw Stephanie out of the basket storyline...I can even write it if Days would let me.

Chloe talks Daniel into getting married right away. AGAIN! This time he doesn't want to rush. It never ends with these people. Daniel calls Melanie and she's like WHATTTT??!! Melanie doesn't think it's a good idea and it sucks when she is right and no one listens. She's having a mini Maggie moment. Daniel and his daughter discuss Chloe but he still wants to marry her. Side note: Carly has been in surgery way to freaking long. Chloe and Daniel's surgeries combined didn't take this long. Chloe decides to call Nicole and BLAB about everything and of course Melanie walks in. Though Melanie didn't really hear anything, I still hope she smacks the cray cray lady.

Previews: Jennifer tells Laura she is not ready to say goodbye. Well yeah cause once it's over they aren't keeping you on contract...LIKE THEY SHOULD!Although maybe its better they don't screw up another old character. Nevermind.

Kate looks at Maddie's papers and says that Stefano cannot possibly know about this. It's coming folks. Right now I am at I TOL...and getting ready to pull out the rest. Chad..your mother is a hooker...and your dad..PIMP!

Chloe asks Daniel if he doesn't want to marry her. I say don't marry her and just have living in sin sex with one another at this point. I don't mind these two together but she needs a vacation, some shock therapy, and a prayer. Add a baby and this just spells years of annoying problems. Good Luck to the Danloe fans, this about to get UGLIER!

Friday, June 18, 2010

Days of Our....Oh Who am I Kidding I Didn't Watch...

Only watched half the show today but I didn't miss much. It's one of those NON-FRIDAY episodes where nothing happens or progresses the storyline. This is a quick summary because I didn't watch the whole thing.

Kayla is back to see Alice, but she gets to deal with Stephanie. In this case I would be an absentee mother too. Steph goes on and on about Nathan and Kayla looks like she wanted to stay home. Melissa also returns to town and guess what? She still looked better 20 years ago. I'd also like to invest money in the Salem hotel because where are all these people staying? Maggie's house is NOT that big.

Daniel tells Maggie her Myasthenia Gravis is in remission. YAY MAGGIE! Melanie and her get boding time. Melanie should just forget Carly. Maggie is more her mother than anyone else. In fact, give Maggie the whole damn show. She is the best part and tells people off all the time because they act like morons.

Nicole yells at Dick for what he did to Brady. She loves the big lug. Brady leaves the hospital and goes to see Arianna. Arianna doesn't believe him, kind of like he didn't believe she was innocent. HURTS DOESN'T IT?! Nicole and Brady hug. She tries to comfort him but I think he is upset he doesn't get to see Arianna naked for about 4 weeks now.

Father Matt tells Chloe he can't divulge what she said in confession, but says she has to tell Daniel the truth. I love how Chloe didn't understand the rules of Confession. Nicole learns Chloe is in the hospital and the elevator thing..blah blah blah. Chloe admits that she cheated on Daniel and Nicole insists she has to marry Daniel right away. Well she already pregnant so what's the rush? Oh wait she doesn't know that yet. OOPS! Love how Chloe tells everyone she cheated but NOT Daniel. Does she NOT realize that the MORE people know the HARDER it is to keep a secret?! DUMB WHORE! Daniel pulls off his the invisible stupid hat he is wearing and asks Chloe to tell him the truth....yeah that would be like her wearing underwear...not gonna happen!

Previews: Lucas asks Sami where home is for her these days. Hey they lady gets around. Lucas is the only dude who can keep Sami in check because he actually fights back. I miss the bonehead!

Stefano sits with Kate like its movie night and says: "Showtime!" They are going to watch seriously they are watching porn. It's a sex tape. I find it refreshing a couple can enjoy a good porn together mixed in with a little homicide. Days of Our Snuff films?

Chloe tells Daniel she wants to be his wife right now. THEN MARRY HIM!! Stop interrupting your own wedding. You crazy ass bitch!

Thursday, June 17, 2010

All My Ugly Wigs

EJ was BORING today. I was tempted to hit mute and just stare at him, but Arianna and her glaucoma got distracting. He tells her the terrific news that she gets to stay in jail!!! YAY!! Meanwhile Lexie calls him and breaks the law essentially telling him about Brady, and then tells Arianna who is going to cry all over again. She calls Brady to just to lecture him...FROM HER PRISON CELL!

Brady insists he did not get drunk or take drugs....however he might have fallen off a wagon...that he does think he did. Nicole wants to believe him, and Lexie brings the two closer when she says Nicole saved Brady's life. There is HAND holding. Too bad Dick wasn't involved. Yeah I went there. Brady talks about the money clip, but does not remember the poker game. Good thing too because he blew about 3,000 dollars there. Maggie warns Victor not to yell at Brady, and she keeps him in check. Victor and Maggie are skeptical of Brady's story but believe him. Victor holds Maggie's hand afterwards and she is taken aback a bit....or she is really turned on. Nicole attacks Dick for what he did to Brady....nobody messes with a drunk's man!

Will and Sami still are not getting along. You would think Sami would leave Will alone while his great grandmother is dying. They both discuss matters with Doug and Julie. Doug and Julie are color coordinated today. When Julie learns that Sami is living with EJ she lectures her. She tells her she is basically using EJ as a rebound from Rafe. God I hate when Julie is right! Sami does not want a lecture from her but Julie tells her anyway that she cannot make these kinds of mistakes. Will tells Doug about cool Stefano and living there. Doug gives similar advice. How about everyone just move back into Marlena's townhouse and SHUT UP!

Chad, Madeline and Charlie argue about his leaving Salem for school. He tells them he is staying, and his parents discuss what to do about the matter. Madeline reveals she has bonds in Chad's name as a present, hoping to maybe bribe him into leaving. Mia and Gaby stop being bitches to each other..WHY?! These two deserve each other and should run away on a bus....or get hit by one. Chad tells Mia he's staying in Salem, in part for her, while Gaby has to listen. While I do not mind Gaby being tortured by this conversation, I'm questioning Chad's judgement in liking Mia. She a Ho! He tells them his parents have a problem with Will....SUMMER TEEN MYSTERY! We get one every year it seems. Kate dons the WORST BLOND WIG EVER and poses as Madeline to go through her safety deposit box. She jacks everything before Madeline shows up and Madeline is left with an empty box. Stefano and Kate are thrilled to have the tape, but the camera pans to an envelope. HMMMM. Are the bonds in there or something else?! We shall see...

Previews: Chloe asks Father Matt if he is going to tell Daniel that she slept with Phillip. Okay so much for knowing the way of the Church Chloe. A priest CANNOT reveal what you say in confession. Also, his name is not Carly Manning so you should be okay.

Nicole screams at Baker that if he hurts Brady like this one more time she will want his head on a platter. Who doesn't love Dick on a platter? Can Dick just leave town? He owes everyone money and is involved in illegal activity that everyone seems to know about. Just go!

Brady yells at Arianna that HE DIDN'T DO IT! Funny she said the same thing two weeks ago and you gave her a dirty look like she did. Now who feels unloved?! These two people are really annoying when they are not half naked and having sex. Maybe that is why they are acting worse than usual...LACK OF SEX!

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

One Caroline to Bitch Slap

Nicole discovers Brady unconscious and reeking of Booze....just the way I like Brady. After trying to drunkenly smack a cop, they take Brady to the hospital. Bo wonders what the hell is going on. I feel like this was a WASTE of a practically good drunken storyline. Nicole called Bo to get him out of trouble and Bo realizes Nicole really cares for Brady. I'm shocked she didn't pull him into a drunken kiss. She wants to tell him everything...which is code for we are going to get another dragged out NON confession scene. She realizes Baker is behind everything...which leads me to believe alcohol does make people in Salem smarter.

Madeline tells Chad to stay away from the DiMeras....AGAIN. Chad discusses his dead baby, and how he wants to stay in Salem. Momma don't care. Chad hates that his parents running his life. Meanwhile Stefano and Kate work out their plan to steal Madeline's blackmail evidence. Again, why isn't this story more important? This should be a GOOD storyline and not this once in a while mentioned storyline. Chad needs to be running shit and looking into his mom's past more!

Kate is initially pissed at Stefano because he never tells her about Alice's heath problems. She goes over to see her and runs into Bill. They talk about what ifs and Laura walks in all bitchy. Glad to see that Laura is still a cunt...YEAH I SAID IT. Laura realizes she is a bitch and Bill and Jen and NOT Kate. Whatever, Kate is a bitch and walks it off. Stefano apologizes to Kate, and she admits she does like the big lug. Old people who care for one another is so sweet!

...Just like Victor and Maggie!! He tells her he is sorry to hear about Alice and holds her hands. Caroline is one jealous bitch. She gives Maggie stuff on the house and then tells Victor the pub is closed. BITCH! Victor reminds her that he professed his love and she shot him down. Caroline is a bitter old bitch and if she messes with Maggie and Victor I will personally take her out! Side Note: I love how the older generation of people on the show have me more interested than the regular cast!

Carly tells Bo she wants to go see Alice with him....Bo looks at her like she is crazy! This isn't the same Salem where Alice and Carly are friends. However, Bo agrees and they will see her later. Meanwhile Chloe and Daniel have it out over her stupidity and then she somehow convinces him Father Matt walks out because of an annulment issues with Lucas. Daniel is STUPID. How can he not see through Chloe's guilty faces and lies? It's Bogus! He says he can get a justice of the peace to marry them, and Chloe is all for getting marries AGAIN! This girl is cray cray. Then Carly walks in and Chloe calls her a bitch. Yes she is a bitch and you are a whore. If these two continue to have the SAME scripted conversation everyday, I'm not commenting on them anymore. They literally repeat the same conversations they have had for two weeks now. I'm over this story and I hope someone falls down a well...preferably a show writer.

Previews: EJ tells Arianna he has some bad news. Great she is going to cry again. Does this girl ever get good news? And when she does its LAME. Have her hit the lotto and have random but fabulous sex with EJ everyday. That should cheer her up.

Julie tells Sami that she is making the worst mistake of her life. Is she pregnant again? Oh no wait that is a different kind of mistake. Love how Julie butts into another person's personal life. At least she is consistent. We can't all find love with our stepfathers you know!

Nicole tells Baker that she knows what he did and she could kill him for it. Please do! He likes the Red Sox and Hope. What's next?

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

General Hospital Confessions to Father Matt

Bill and Laura are back to honor Alice at the end of the episode. All it took for the character of Bill to come back was his mother dying. Nathan, Jennifer, Adrienne, and Stephanie are all visiting with Alice. Also, Sami arrives to visit after learning from Lucas that Alice is dying. We get a Sami/Alice flashback that I actually remember seeing. Sami tells Jen all about her and EJ...which is funny because Jen knows all about loving a rapist. Sami blows up at EJ when she finds out her townhouse construction is complete and he didn't tell her....ITS HER MOTHER'S PLACE! She forgives him right away and this whole argument didn't even matter. She is going to stay at the mansion and try not to get pregnant. EJ worries about the Anna situation. Just sleep with Sami and move on with your life EJ.

Rafe and Shane overtake their guards and escape. We have to watch Rafe get strangled for a half hour and then see him get away dammit. He goes to see Anna, but she is gone. Anna we got to watch try to stand and move towards a door for an hour. The action and adventure in this storyline is so overwhelming.

Brady gets drugged. Brady falls down. Dick comes with bottle and pours booze in Brady's mouth. Brady in big trouble. Dick pours booze over Brady so he smells. Someone better not light match near Brady. By the way the caveman speak was to honor the look on Brady's face as he wobbled around town.

Chloe stops the wedding to confesses to Father Matt about her constantly referenced to sex with Phillip. She gives full on names and doesn't really understand how this priest things works if you ask me. I was terrified she was going to get into detail about the sex. Father Matt realizes she is cray cray and says he has to agree with Carly. If someone has to agree with Carly then you KNOW you did something really stupid. He tells Daniel he is NOT marrying them. I think Matt is upset Chloe didn't cheat with him. Phillip is just shitting himself in the waiting room and aging about 50 years because of this stupid storyline. Stephanie and Nathan arrive and are surprised Daniel and Chloe are getting married. Steph can tell Phil is lying about something.

Carly decides this is the perfect opportunity to be Melanie's mommy and take advantage of the situation. Nice move there Carly, wait til she finds out you knew Chloe was a cheater! They also talk about the "kind of woman' Chloe is...yeah WHORE. Daniel this WHOLE episode just wants to know what the fuck is going on?! He keeps asking questions and getting lame ass answers. You would think a Doctor and someone experienced with Chloe's cheating would realize it has to do with her being a WHORE!

Previews: Kate asks Stefano what the hell is the matter with him. That's actually a good question. Stefano has become a big softy. Too bad John Black is gone and he doesn't have anyone he can try to kill as much. Rafe is just a pain in the ass, whereas John he got the chance to screw with. Stefano needs to put a hit on half the town anyway.

Chloe calls Carly a BITCH! Okay, I'm on Chloe's side with that comment. Carly is just annoying with her same old ass speech as always saying that she should tell the truth, Daniel loves her...blah blah blah. She should save us all the trouble and tape record herself for Chloe to listen to every ten minutes. Too bad Chloe was so far away she couldn't call Carly a Bitch and then spit on that's DRAMA!

Bo and Nicole are with Brady at the hospital. Bo is wondering what the hell happened? I feel like Bo is always wondering what the hell is going on. Let's see. Maybe he feels threatened by Brady's stupidity and fears of losing his title as the dumb one in the family. Nicole probably smells the booze on Brady and wonders why she wasn't invited to the party.

Monday, June 14, 2010

The Dumb Chloe and the Brandless Brady

Carly continues to insist Chloe has to tell Daniel about her the affair. Are we surprised? At this point I'd like Chloe to shoot Carly in the throat so she turns mute for two weeks and stops talking about the damn affair. Chloe calls her a hypocrite and Carly looks shocked that Chloe used it correctly in a sentence. Chloe also gets a visit from Vivian who is now finally annoyed by the "stupid little twit." She wants to make Chloe pay now, but I'm sure she'll forget the minute someone else annoys her.

Melanie tells Phillip she's finally okay with the wedding, and Daniel overhears. He is such a goober and so happy is daughter is on his side. She calls herself a mistake, but he corrects her and tell her she was an accident. Wow that was all warm and fuzzy. Actually isn't it all Daniel's fault he didn't have any protection? Phillip visits Chloe again and they also have the same freaking discussion. If I were Chloe I'd just ask for some drugs and some guards at the door. The wedding starts and Father Matt is ready to begin. However, Carly walks in and Chloe stops the wedding...She should have waited until Father Matt asked if anyone objects.

Nicole tells Baker to keep out of sight, so he goes to poker games? That makes sense. They also come to the AMAZING conclusion that if they keep quiet, no one will know anything. Anyone else amazed that someone finally figured this out? Brady joins the poker game to get information on the guy who stole his money clip. Watching Brady lose thousands of dollars is annoying as hell because we are in a recession and are not as rich as Brady! This poker game is not exciting, and its obvious that Brady doesn't belong there. Baker catches Brady at the game and arranges to have his drink drugged. Meanwhile Nicole deals with Vivian...which was fun until she mentioned Arianna....UGHHHHH.

Sami tells EJ there is a physical attraction between them, but they have to get over it and just be parents. I think what she meant to say was... "Let's have sex and use protection so we DO NOT become parents AGAIN!" Sami dreams of Rafe, which would be my nightmare. He tells her he may never come back to her.....okay this dream is getting better! If I had a dream about Rafe he would at least be shirtless. Sami cannot even dream correctly! She even tells Rafe about the EJ situation. I'm glad Sami has a fictitious girl talk conversation with her ex about her other ex. That's love!

Shane gets taken away to be executed. Yeah who cares, he'll get away. Really this is orchestrated to take care of Rafe. EJ and Stefano discuss Alice Horton and its very sweet. Stefano is very moving when he discusses how feisty Alice was, and EJ asks him to not share the news with Sami yet. They hug and I Awwww'ed. Stefano makes a call to have Rafe removed. A guard helps Rafe, and then attacks him. He starts choking him and the scene ends....I was looking forward to seeing him strangled some more. Rude Days!

Previews: Sami asks EJ if he is keeping something from her. He has been keeping something from you for a while and you NOW figure it out?! He is going to probably be telling her about Alice when he should really be admitting HEY I might have kidnapped ur baby.

Chloe says she'd like to go to confession. Is she going to confess to the affair or the fact that she is annoyingly loud every time she discusses the affair? At least it's Father Matt time and she gets to again tell him what a slut she is. Too bad for her Father Matt loves Chloe sexual confession time.

Melanie asks Carly if she thinks Chloe's going to break Daniel's heart. While I am happy that Melanie and Carly are getting along, it would have been nice if oh, maybe we saw them actually start to like each other BEFORE this RANDOM conversation about Daddy Daniel! She hated her guts then just decided let's talk about my daddy. It would be really nice if these two had a heart to heart moment about Carly's life and bonding moments, but NOOOOO that would make too much sense.

Friday, June 11, 2010

Days of Our Boredom

This is going to be short, sweet and to the point since this was one of the WORST FILLER episodes of all time. Nothing was really accomplished and nothing was moved along. Confusing when compared to a regular episode of Days I know, but this time was bad because it was pointless and there was no need to see anyone.

EJ had on a very nice suit. In fact if he never gets changed, I really would not mind. Okay scratch that he needs to be half naked again. He threatens Nicole for the whole episode but he has nothing on the woman. Nicole can't figure how she ever loved EJ, but I mean girlllllll look at him!

Melanie sticks her nose in Arianna and Brady's relationship. Arianna says Brady is TOO SMART....that might make her the dumbest character on the show for that one statement. The best part was Melanie smacking Brady for being stupid. Victor and Brady also have words about how Arianna sucks, but he loves her. I say move on unless you both realize that you are Ethan and Theresa and move back to Harmony.

Bo tells Hope he's sorry about how she found out about the divorce papers. Who cares? Oh that's right NO ONE! Bo needs a good shot in the crotch and Hope needs a all you can eat buffet STAT! These two are so annoying that they deserve each other. Bo leaves to visit Alice, and Hope just stands around crying. She decides not to take her pills anymore, but now I want them and this episode made me form a drug habit.

Marie comes to see her mom. She, Maggie and Jennifer reminisce about Alice, holding hands. At least she left out the part where she had sex with her brother....although that story never gets old. If a guest arrives each day where the hell are all these people sleeping?! While I like flashbacks, the memorial is being stretched out to the point they want us crying everyday. However, that is not working since the rest of the episode STINKS!

Previews: Chloe tells Carly that she will not cave in to her self-righteous blackmail. Who taught Chloe what self-righteous means? Is it really blackmail when the fool who is threatening you doesn't want anything in return? Yeah, quit while you are ahead Chloe.

Vivian says to herself that Chloe will pay. So now Chloe is in trouble with Vivian? Why don't they just tell the girl she can never spray tan again. That will make her cry. Why is she wasting her time making Chloe pay? Get back to Carly and how much she sucks or something...or BETTER YET focus on the real threat named Maggie Horton.
Sami asks EJ if he still wants her. I wouldn't! And if he does can I make a special request that we see the condom being used because I can't take anymore Sami babies for the next couple of years. Seriously the woman is a breeding machine.

Thursday, June 10, 2010

As the Jennifer Horton reTurns

Jennifer Horton is BACK! Maggie thinks she belongs in Salem..CAN I GET AN AMEN!! HELL YEAH! I approve this message and Maggie is speaking the gospel according to the fandom! Jennifer runs into Carly and they have a short hug and squee. They go over Carly's history of stabbing a husband and being NON parents to children. Then Jen meets up with Bo and Hope. She stumbles upon Bo and Hope's divorce papers and doesn't even try to hide them. Okay I know its been a while and you are rusty, BUT next time chuck those papers Jen.

The remembering Alice memorial is underway and we get more flashbacks. This time we see Alice dealing with hairy Bo from back in the day. I'm still amazed at how much hair that man had on his body at one point. He could warm a freezing village with all that hair. Hope and Bo reminisce after Carly leaves but its cut short when Jen arrives. Bo comforts Caroline over Alice's soon to be death. Then he remembers he is a jackass who left the divorce papers on the table. Hope is upset to see the paper, and I am upset to see Bo's real name. I don't need to be reminded of that mess.

In other exciting news....I GOT A SHOUTOUT ON THE SHOW! Yes, I am afraid this is true folks, since Shawn Christian and Nadia Bjorlin both confirmed to me in person that the usage of "HOT MESS" on the show was inspired by MOI! Its a true story!Chloe doesn't tell Daniel anything, are we surprised? She does have Phillip fetch the wedding gift to Daniel....which is a watch?! I expected a tanning bed dammit. Daniel decides they should get married right there in her hospital room. Cue Father Matt folks, that riveting old hottie hipster. Carly tells Chloe she has to tell Daniel about her affair before they get married....for the MILLIONTH TIME! Carly can suck it at this point. Daniel calls Melanie and tells her he is marrying Chloe, and she shits her pants..... I wish I was kidding but that's the face she made.

Melanie tells Nathan Stephanie stopped taking her birth control pills. Wow you are a day too late and stay out of it like your mother is not doing. Nathan freaks out on Melanie and tells her how Stephanie prevented a pregnancy and told the truth. He yells at her and now Melanie really knows how Carly Manning feels everyday of her damn life.

Arianna and Nicole have the same old argument where Nicole pretends to be nice and Arianna doesn't buy it. Okay why does Arianna look better than Nicole when Ari is the one in jail? Who dressed and destroyed Nicole's hair and makeup? This is upsetting. EJ tells Nicole he thinks she's responsible for the muggings. Well he couldn't be more wrong and why can't he go back to yelling at Sami like he yells at Nicole. This is getting boring. And nude male update alert: Brady had his shirt on today THANK can we work on getting EJ more shirtless. THANK YOU!

Previews: Arianna tells Melanie that she knows Nicole would do anything to get Brady. I'm still not sure why. Brady needs to be alone and learn how to get some brain cells before he hooks up with anyone again. Also, let's try getting with someone who does not have a prison record this time. Thanks Brady!

Nicole yells at EJ to get his hands off her.....Wow I would scream the total opposite. Just me? No? Yeah I didn't think so. Nicole its been a while since jail so go find a guy who is willing to sleep with you please. Preferably someone hot who likes to drink.

Jennifer asks Hope if she really wants the divorce. See I would not want the divorce because I'd want to torture Bo all the days of their lives. Bo and Hope deserve each other because only they can stand each other's company for long periods of time. That is love people. Hope loves Bo, and at this point it's obvious she just doesn't want to admit she was an asshole and neither does he. The End.

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

The Bo Divorce and the Beautiful Scratched up Chloe....BITCH!

Okay I just want to make it very clear off the bat I WILL NOT be mocking anything Alice related. It's just too sad and since Frances Reid passed in real life, I will not be making any negative comments. The Alice flashbacks were great, and I have free reign on Julie and he old up do. But other than that, honoring the late Frances Reid is important and I can be nice dammit! Today marked the beginning of the whole town learning that Alice's condition is deteriorating.

Chloe wakes up and tells Daniel she has ruined everything. Did she break the tanning bed? Okay, the whole episode she feels guilty but Daniel and even Melanie who is snooping around learn nothing. Carly decides AGAIN to not tell Daniel anything, but warns Chloe that she has to tell him. This flip flopping is making me queasy. Melanie asks Carly what was going on, and she DOES NOT tell her daughter anything, which will cause friction in the future DAMMIT! Phillip cannot believe that Carly knows and Chloe is the biggest idiot on the planet in his eyes. Too bad he didn't figure it out when he was screwing her.Daniel overhears as Phillip tells Chloe she has to keep quiet.... yeah good luck with that, and while you are at it share that advice with Carly.

Stephanie tells Nathan she isn't pregnant....well THANK GOD! Then she tells Caroline, who got knocked up in her day I bet. That lady just probably stole books off the book cart dammit. Have her arrested please. She learns about Alice, as does Nathan who is about to tell Melanie. Basically this is a BAD EPISODE where everyone is learning about Alice and its depressing!!

SeeWhoreA tells Theo that her mother was with another man. Theo takes the opportunity to hit on her. Young love! Bo tells Abe his marriage is over, but Abe disagrees. Listen Abe, its been two years since Lexie's last affair. Why don't you go make sure she isn't sleeping around again? Stay OUT of Bo and Hope's marriage when you have a wife who sleeps around with people her age, who are usually related to you. Bo learns about Alice from a crying, dry heaving Hope. Carly comes over and looks jealous that Bo is holding the skeleton. She's dead, you cannot be jealous of someone who is dead.

Stefano and Kate plot to get the tape from Madeline. What is on this tape dammit???! and why is this storyline not more important. WE KNOW THEY ARE PROSTITUTES! Just tell me what is on the damn tape and give them more than two days a week if they even get that. And when you bring Jessica Tuck on your show...USE HER DAMMIT! Maddie and Chad plan his graduation, and Will is invited. Maddie is upset, but not as upset as I AM when the boys talk about her being a MILF! EWWWW.Chad, Will and Tad wonder about the story behind the picture of Madeline and Kate. It's a mystery...maybe Kate is Chad's dad....DUN DUN DUN.

Previews: Melanie tells Nathan that Stephanie's not taking her birth control pills. Well too little too late. And the bitch fessed up, and this storyline is going nowhere because everyone is too nice and a good person. Unfortunately we have to wait for Phillip to get caught for ANYTHING to happen.

Arianna tells Nicole she is on to her. Bitch! You have been saying that since the lady got out of jail. DO SOMETHING ABOUT HER THEN! Don't stand there taking her shit. Nicole owns your ass. Arianna: Sleep with EJ and get over Brady for now. Thank You.

Jennifer IS BACK!!! YAY! Okay its for a sad reason but I am happy that an old character that I loved is back. Also, I am going to laugh when she disses Carly for her cousin Hope. Watch it happen people.

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

All My Elevator Accidents

Gaby is in this episode. I'd like to pretend she was not so POOF she is gone! In fact, none of her scenes of pointlessness ever happened. Brady goes to see Arianna, but after learning that he was with Nicole she thinks she is screwed and that Brady should just get out of her life because he still falls fr Nicole's crap. Arianna and Brady are just upset it has been so long since they have had sex and been naked.

Speaking of Hernandez people in prison...RAFE is still in jail with Shane! Another pointless storyline that went nowhere today! Rafe and Shane got caught trying to escape but plan to escape again. Can the Hernandez family just stay in jail and have Gaby move out of town because she is a minor who has no parental supervision currently!

Chloe saves Carly and shoves her out of the elevator, but the doors close on her as the lights are flickering and here comes the LAME elevator fall. Daniel finds her and performs not even fake CPR. Lexie and Carly perform the quickest brain surgery known to man. Chloe does NOT have a bandage on her head....WTF? She has bruises on her face and the brain surgery does not even make a difference at all...because we all know Chloe never had a brain. She wakes up to Daniel at her side, saying she is sorry. My God, her coma was more realistic.

Vivian is nervous on her wedding night because she wants to hear that Carly died. Well she should be because Victor made a comment about raping her!! Something every woman wants to hear on their wedding night. Vivian calls the hospital with the worst Southern accent asking about the woman in the elevator. She learns that Chloe got the shaft and not Carly. Bad joke but consider the show people!

Phillip has a nightmare that Melanie figured out that he slept with Chloe...oh she's not that smart yet. Maggie finds Phillip and wonders what is wrong, trying to convince him that Melanie will not leave him. Melanie and Phillip rush to the hospital when they hear about Chloe from Daniel. I would have brought popcorn and enjoyed the show. Also, I enjoy that Daniel called his daughter in the middle of the night to let her know that the woman she DOES NOT want him marrying was injured. Then Carly tells them that Chloe saved her. OMG what a dumbass to not figure out the crazy lady was trying to kill you.

EJ and Sami take the WHOLE DAMN episode to kiss. I didn't even pay attention to the crap they were talking beforehand. Then when they FINALLY kiss Sami stops EJ and runs out of the room. I suspect she thought she was going to get pregnant from it.

Previews: Stefano tells Kate that he wants the tape. So we are back to the interesting Madeline storyline they stuck in the corner! This storyline actually has potential so of course they don't show it everyday, and just once every two weeks! Yeah for CHAD time too!

Bo tells Abe that this marriage... it's over. Wow I didn't know Bo and Abe were married. So sad. Okay obviously that means Bo filed for divorce and he and Hope are yeah right! Bo and Hope are stuck together forever, deal with it people. Misery loves company..and boy is Bo in for another lifetime of misery!

Hope asks Maggie and Julie what happened to Gran?.... Okay this is going to be sad!The highlight will be the return of past cast members like Jennifer Horton this week....Carly has a friend, but I'm sure this NEW Carly will do something to blow it.

Monday, June 7, 2010

General Cray Cray at the Hospital

Rafe and Shane....Shane an Rafe. If they were more boring...well we would all be dead. The crappy part of this is Shane wasn't boring, but teaming him with Rafe...BORING! They discuss Sami (because her love life is apparently international news) and how the Brady women get under your skin....and pregnant, don't forget pregnant! They stage a fake fight in order to escape the prison....too bad they don't get caught. I was actually going to enjoy seeing an execution just like when Sami got the lethal injection back in the day.

Not to be outdone by her big brother Rafe, Arianna...BORING! Her and EJ need to just have sex, and then MAYBE I will enjoy Arianna time. That man needs his clothing off, and Sami is not moving fast enough. Arianna is screwed however, and not in a good way! Nicole is her alibi and she publicly talks about planting evidence withe Brady to make Arianna look innocent with the DA hanging around. Someone tell the Charlie from Empty Nest...he is NOT playing Charlie from Empty Nest! He tells Arianna that she is stuck in jail....and she is officially dehydrated from all the crying. Meanwhile Nicole and Brady are hugging over her "mistake" and Gaby walks up pissed off. Nicole needs booze and a bat to deal with that annoying brat.

Chloe is so CRAY CRAY! She calls the elevator guy who says "Hey call me Otis!" At first I'm like of ALL the names in the world he gives OTIS?! Then the fabulous @DonnaDPool explained that is an inside joke because OTIS was a company that made elevators. Wow who know Days had it in them! So I can no longer make fun of Otis, even though he sounded like a creepy phone sex operator from Jersey. Then she has creepy internal voice time!! Chloe is a winner...of the Cray Cray of the Day/Month/Year contest. She decides to stop Carly from getting on the elevator but Daniel charges in and gives Chloe her ring. She tells Daniel she has to go get his gift...which is stopping Carly from dying....This was on my wedding registry immediately. Carly and Chloe then argue at the hospital, where they discuss the WORD of the day: CRAZY! Carly calls Chloe crazy in a nice way, and Chloe screams I'M NOT CRAZY! Daniel appears at the hospital after receiving a call from Carly, and Chloe looks like she wants Carly on that elevator. Dear Carly, learn to take the freaking stairs. Thanks. xoxo

Sami and EJ are having family quality time and Johnny is all about Rafe. I'd just like Johnny to get a muzzle for his birthday so we don't have to hear him scream anymore. He ignores his dad, can't stand his mom, and likes Rafe. Well he had me with 2 out of 3 qualities, but liking Rafe is a huge sin. He falls down and Mommy and Daddy take care of him. Okay, these two are so slow, that I paid more attention to baby Sydney. Sydney wore a fabulous pink ensemble and was texting with Ali Sweeney's phone the whole time. Give the kid an EMMY!

Stephanie tells Nathan she lost her birth control pills and thinks she might be pregnant...... They made even THIS BORING! Okay so Stephanie did the nice thing and told Nathan a half truth, but its still something. WHAT THE HELL?! I'm confused. Is this girl a villain or a heroine? The writers NEED to decide what the hell to do with Stephanie. They keep having her screw up, then do something nice, to screw up again. PICK ONE! If she is going to be a bitch, let's try that angle THANKS! Nathan was also very understanding. This is not a soap story!! It was a movie of the week.

Previews: Sami tells EJ she can't imagine her life without him. How far we have come from a year ago. Yeah, there were plenty of times you imagined him out of your life and then Alllll of a sluttennn you love the guy. This will last until Rafe comes back, and then poof Oh yeah I love Rafe again. ARG AHH! EJ needs to find someone who will just love him for his rapist self. And please take the shirt off.

Victor tells Vivian that If anything happens to Carly Manning, their marriage is over. Well technically, if Victor learns that Chloe got hurt shoving Carly out of the way that IS something. Hell, Carly gets attacked on a daily basis, so Vivian is in trouble on this one. Also, I am a very loud Team Viggie person! Bring on the love of the older generation.

Daniel stands outside the elevator and hears Chloe screaming. Actually its more of a bellowing. You would think Daniel would recognize his fiance's screaming from the bedroom, but Noooo. Also I think its amazing Daniel thinks someone will answer after having crashed in the elevator. Usually loud screaming followed by a bang would indicate someone is unconscious.

Thursday, June 3, 2010

One Morning After Pill to Take

Carly has annoyed the crap out of me again. She decides to tell Daniel everything, and then decides she shouldn't tell him. Make up your damn mind. She calls Chloe, who has been going over in her mind if she should kill Carly, and freaks the hell out on her. Carly tells her that lying is bad and then mistakenly uses the word CRAZY. Chloe freaks out screaming NOT TO USE THAT WORD! She should have said Cray Cray. Carly freaks out saying Daniel now HAS to know, and Chloe decides that Manning should die. I just wish one of these bitches really did die, or went into a coma because they are the biggest pain in the asses right now.

Stephanie and Nathan have relationship talk. I only wanted to kill myself about 3 times. It was a good day. She realizes that she is gross for trying to get pregnant. Poor Adrienne has to explain to her that there is such thing as a morning after pill in case she might be pregnant. Nathan deals with a sick patient, and he hugs Melanie over it, with Phillip growling in the background. After Stephanie takes the pill, she leaves the box out and Nathan wonders what she is doing. Guess Nathan has not gone been working closely with the OBGYN department in the hospital.

The whole episode Phillip has to convince Melanie that Chloe is right for her dad. She does not get it at all, and quite frankly neither do I. He finally gets her to shut up when he offers her some sex. Good deal, and thank you for taking it Mel! Daniel talks to Carly first, which was pointless, and then Maggie about his marriage. Can he just leave Maggie alone? Seriously yes she takes care of your kid, but the lady is sick and just has to deal with everyone else's shit. Leave her be so she can concentrate on her love life.....with Victor. Victor and Maggie are so cute. She puts him in his place and he says he "hates" her which means he is smitten. Vivian and him leave for their honeymoon, but before they do he threatens to get rid of her if something should happen to Carly. Something always happens to's annoying. If she's not getting buried alive, she is getting branded a nosy bitch.

Hope gets the wallets back from that little freak of a child. She has Baker mess with the car alarm while she sneaks in to take back her shit. Bo searches the backpack and SeeWhoreA is upset that it is empty and someone stole her treasure. I hope someone is writing this down for when then have her commitment hearing. Caroline gives the little freak...a ROSARY! She has trouble holding it which means she is satanic. SeeWhoreA needs the Lord in her life, and not Bo and Hope. Baker starts hitting on Hope and I have no idea why, or where they are going with this. My take on it: EWWWWWW! SeeWhoreA catches mommy and Dick embracing. Yeah I said it.

Previews: Nicole tells Brady she can clear Arianna. Well stop talking about it and go do it then. These people talk to much. Why don't you stop for drinks or blackmail him in order to save her? He will REALLY love you then!

Arianna asks EJ for one more favor. Well see this is why you never help people. You help them once and they think you are ALWAYS going to help them. Now what does she want? Okay, if she asks to sleep with him, I may start liking Arianna on that reason alone.

Chloe tells Carly she has to talk to her. Shove the bitch in the elevator already. Whenever they talk its the SAME conversation. At least smack each other around or something. There are only so many times you can tell someone to tell the truth before you realize THEY ARE NOT GOING TO DO IT! Also, Chloe is crazy and needs to be committed no matter how this turns out. The girl became freakish after she lost her fake baby. Get her some meds please.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Guiding Chloe...through a Murder Plot

Melanie does not want her father marrying Chloe....probably because she is only about 5 years older than her and no one ever seems to want to address the obvious age difference between Chloe and Daniel. Melanie thinks Chloe is desperate when she learns she wanted to elope with Daniel after finding out that Daniel planned the wedding for tomorrow. Melanie is smart now and it's confusing where this all came from. Let's enjoy it before it all goes away and she spazzes out. Daniel insists Chloe makes him happy, and Phillip backs him up. Daniel asks Phillip to walk Chloe down the aisle. Can this GET ANY WORSE? Does everyone know that Phillip and Chloe USED TO have sex? Are they aware of that?

Carly has to deal with the devil child and then the devil snatches away her loot from the evil witch. Carly better watch her back! SeeWhoreA is scarier than Vivian and Chloe combined. Then Carly blames herself for the bad stuff that happened with the creeper. NOW Carly Manning is blaming HERSELF for everything. Told you this would happen. Carly runs into Daniel and apologizes for being anti-wedding. However, she has that "I'm going to put that damn foot in my mouth again" face when she learns Chloe insists on marrying Daniel.

Bo tries to see the secret treasure the little creeper is hiding but Caroline comes over. Yes folks, Bo was searching his daughter's things because she is that evil. Caroline comes over bitching that Victor married Vivian. Okay, first off you told Victor that you were not interested. Second, you ain't Maggie Horton a retired boozer so get to steppin.' Okay that was fun! Seriously, Caroline has no business getting involve in Victor's love life, when she removed herself from it. And OMG its like the Golden Girls in heat on Days with Viv, Caroline, and Maggie fighting over Victor.

All this time Hope and Baker have met up and she takes him to her home. She shows him that her family lives there and he realizes she is married to Bo and has a child. Then she notices that little devil child has the wallets. Okay! This one line PROVES TO ME, that someone on that show reads my stuff. Hope refers to her own child as: THAT LITTLE DEVIL! Even the creeper's mother thinks her child is a daughter of Satan. THANK YOU!

Chloe decides she has to get rid of Carly so she calls...Vivian?! Why she thinks this is a good idea is beyond me. When Nicole, who is evil yet doesn't kill people is your friend, accept HER help! So Vivian tells Chloe she has the perfect way to get rid of Carly and it involves an ELEVATOR! Then Vivian reminds the audience that THIS HAS BEEN DONE ALREADY ON THIS SHOW! Lovely, how Days admits they are reusing the same stuff over and over again. Chloe is not seeing the big picture and questions why Vivian is being so cryptic, and how this man's phone number will help her. She claims she is not stupid.....Chloe...when someone tells you that a person is going to be put in an elevator and taken care of....IT MEANS THEY ARE GETTING KILLED! Vivian is appalled that she has to spell it out for her. Chloe finally gets it, and just gives that wide eyed deer in headlights look. Chloe is dumber than's official!

EJ talks to Nicole about how she can provide Arianna with an alibi. Nicole is less than thrilled and EJ is gloating about how he will have her put back in prison when he can prove her part in everything. Honestly, I stopped paying attention to their conversation because James Scott looks fine in that pink and grey suit number. Arianna also gets her clothes from Brady, but they are still not getting along. EJ visits Ari and thinks things are going well. They hug, and when the hell are they going to do it already? Just sleep together so we can get it over with. Nicole runs into Brady and she says she might be able to help Ari. Brady is really trying to catch up to Chloe in the dumb department since he lost his crown.

Previews: Daniel yells at Carly that he is marrying Chloe and there is nothing she can do about it. You know what? Let the bastard marry the whore and just leave this idiots alone. Step away from the tard Carly! If you don't have feelings for Daniel, just leave him alone and let his life crash and burn so you and Melanie can have movie nights! Worry about your own crappy life!

Chloe asks Vivian if she meant she wanted her to kill Carly. Okay, so Chloe STILL has not caught on really. It actually takes ANOTHER episode for it to all sink in. This girl has problems. Vivian should just kill Chloe and pin the murder on Carly at this rate. Do not let this idiot try to kill anyone. She cannot even understand a stupid murder plot!

Hope stares at the little creeper and says it's time to say goodbye to her life. Okay, I know she is going after Bo, but I say get rid of the little creeper while you are at it. Leave her with some nuns and pray she accepts Jesus as her savior. Also, not only say goodbye to your life, get rid of the freaking bump-it while you at it!

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

The Young Creeper Child and her Restless Mother

Gaby's face was the first thing I saw. I almost stopped watching immediately! She complained to Sami that she wanted to know where Rafe was and she wanted someone to help her sister. Sami should have had her escorted off the property. Arianna is with EJ and the two work on her case, figuring out one person can give her an alibi....Nicole: Ari is screwed!! She does not want Brady's help and the one person who can save her put her there. SCREWED! Sami learns that EJ is her lawyer, and she seems turned on. EJ visits with Nicole wondering why she isn't helping Ari. Does he REALLY have to ask that question? Brady, HELLO.

Bo and Hope find an empty box under Hope's bed. That little freaking creeper stole all her mom's wallets. Hope thinks its too difficult to talk to Bo with everything that has happened. She just wants to talk about their evil spawn. The creeper stares at the wallets and stuffs them all in her oversized backpack. She goes over her dad's place and proceeds to be rude to Carly. Carly tries to bond with her and SeeWhoreA shoots her an evil look and backs away from Carly like she has a social disease. "Hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii Ccccccccaaaarrrlllllyyy" I'm having nightmares tonight! Carly tries to see what the freak has in her backpack but SeeWhoreA almost chops off her hand and says those are HER secrets! Seriously is there a therapist on set?? Evil Hope is back after another pill popping session. Maybe she can cut the Dick jokes off.

Okay Carly deserved to lose the hand because of the mess she created today! She tells Daniel NOTHING, except that she has to tell him something. He announces he is going to get married tomorrow and yells at Carly for complaining. Carly then proceeds to threaten Chloe AGAIN that if she won't tell Daniel, Carly will. OMG JUST TELL HIM THEN! Carly announces she is "not there to make friends." Apparently she decided this very early on and she's succeeded immensely. Chloe and Vivian discuss the Carly situation, and Chloe decides that eloping with Daniel is the smartest thing ever. He tells her NO, so she screwed too. I seriously dislike this storyline right now! Just shove her in the damn elevator already.

Onto my FAVORITE story: Victor and Maggie. Vivian is sad because Victor is nowhere to be found on their wedding night. Someone wants to get laid! Victor is with Maggie, and they are being cute! He wants to spend the night talking to her about Mickey and Isabella. Okay these two surprisingly warm my cold bitter heart. Vivian calls Victor but he wants nothing to do with her, and she cries. Awwwwwwwww. Vivian needs a boyfriend..where is Ivan?

Previews: Vivian tells Chloe that if they work together they can stop Carly. Oh, nothing will stop Carly Manning 2.0! Everyone hates her, but the lady won't die. She's like Stefano just without the nice suits, accent and the humor. Vivian needs to focus on not losing Victor and Chloe needs to just go tanning and forget she ever met Carly.

Daniel tells Melanie and Phillip that he is getting married tomorrow. Melanie screams NOOO. Wow Melanie should have screamed that loudly when Nathan tries to kiss her. Lovely how Melanie thinks Daniel and Chloe are all wrong for one another. See this actually makes sense because Chloe is a cray cray and who would want their father to marry a girl with a whore track record? HELL she slept with her husband too! Melanie is winning points in the smart department...she's getting there.

EJ tells Nicole he thinks she is going back to prison. Well way to jinx it EJ. He was doing so well in the smart department and NOW he hits a wall. She is not going to prison, and now you have brought her back into your life so she can destroy it all over again. Way to go! Why not talk loudly and tell her you kidnapped Sydney....oh wait that's going to happen. OOPS.
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