Thursday, March 11, 2010

Days of Our Prison Block

Nicole is finally back! She is kicking her cell mate's ass, her ugly ass by the way. Okay this ugly woman is giving inmates a bad reputation.

Daniel goes to visit Melanie, who is on the phone with Philip. He sees that she is being a Debbie Downer so he leaves quickly. As a doctor he should have really prescribed her some uppers. C'Mon Dad.

EJ comes back from dropping off the kids and he is dressed like a normal human being. Look how clean and shiny he is. It's so pretty to look at. Too bad he is a douche. Sami complains Rafe did not come home last night. Well in all fairness to Rafe, EJ snores. Rafe is still at the police station actually working.........This still frightens me. Rafe says that kidnappers always leave something behind. Of course as he says this Anna is packing her shit, and leaves out the...UGLY LEOPARD BOOTS.

Nicole is still fighting with her cellmate and who comes rushing in but a prison guard to bust up all the fun. BOO! That was the first interesting cat fight we have seen in a while. Nicole apparently hurt herself in beating the crap out of the ugly Tiffany lady. I feel bad for anyone named Tiffany today who had to hear their name associated with the ugly. Nicole gets respect in prison because she is still using the DiMera last name....Really it is the lack of that ugly black wig!

Ethan and Theresa are just chilling. They both have plans for the day and decide to meet up later. Anyone else riveted by this conversation? It was going great until I realized it was still Brady and Arianna I was watching.

Nicole gets thrown back into her cell. She makes a joke about Ida Lupino was not funny. Nicole warns her cellmate that if she smirks she will "swallow her teeth." Little does Nicole know that Tiffany's teeth are fake and she can actually swallow them. The women then call a truce, and Tiffany mocks respecting Nicole. Nicole won't have none of that and grabs the bitch to set her straight.....well as straight as is possible with a lady like Tiffany. Long story short: Nicole has her own bitch!

EJ and Sami are bonding with Sydney. Based on their conversation they are trying to teach her to say "all the Days of our Lives."

Daniel visits Maggie to talk about being Melanie's father. Really he is there for the free coffee because Java Cafe severely overcharges. Daniel wants to be a good father but he does not know how. He should take Melanie on some of his tanning sessions and get their hair frosted together.

Arianna visits Melanie. Melanie should start crying because Arianna is annoying. She brings up Philip and Nathan...Melanie shuts down the conversation. Really, the girl was shot, can we not talk about her love life?

Chloe and Brady meet up to chat. They talk about Nicole and who should tell her Sydney is back. It seems that Nicole's prison is a low security prison because her cellmate has smuggled in a flask of booze. Only in Salem Prison are you allowed to enjoy cocktails in enormously large prison cells.
By the way...Nicole looks fabulous in an orange jumpsuit. Not that many people can work Sami Brady in the 90s.

Chloe seems extremely excited to visit Nicole in jail. It's perfectly clear Chloe harbors some lesbian tendencies for Nicole Walker. Brady wonders how Chloe is doing, but she does not want to talk about herself, plus she has a long drive ahead of her. I'd be amazed if Chloe can work the GPS in her car.

Maggie and Daniel talk about how Chloe is dealing with everything. Um, who cares? Daniel changes the subject and comments on how RUDE Maggie is being. The Bitch did not even offer to get him some coffee. He realizes that there is something wrong with her arm. Anyone else shocked Daniel noticed something other than a woman's boobs or ass?

Arianna tells Melanie that she turned down Brady's proposal. Melanie yaps at her like a feisty Pomeranian. Arianna claims she is an idiot......she caught the disease from Brady.

As Sami starts to ask questions, EJ leaves THAT's how you get rid of him. Sami then calls Rafe to tell him that her other lover left, so he can come back now. That was really sweet and considerate of her.

Rafe realizes that this case is personal. Wonder what tipped him off? Sami's baby was kidnapped, they faked the baby's death twice, and who knew kidnapping a baby was cruel? Anna is still packing, and STILL forgetting to pack her boots. She should donate them to the poor, since there is nothing like a stylish homeless person.

Daniel asks, in the creepiest way possible, to see Maggie's hand. Maggie is afraid to....probably cause she has heard what Daniel does with female patients hands. She shows him the huge bruise she has...and AWWWWWWWWWWWWW that was sad.

Nicole gets a visitor, and thinks its her mom like always. The prison guard is shocked that it's actually NOT her mother. Lovely how Nicole gets visitors in prison, but Carly gets treated like she has the PLAGUE in Salem. That makes perfect sense.

Brady comes over to visit Sydney....because she has not been traumatized enough. Sydney actually wants to say "Who is the bozo?" Sami mentions that EJ left and Rafe did not come home last night. I'm sure Brady really came over to hear all about Sami's sex life.

Arianna visits Rafe, who is still working like a mad man. He is still trying to figure everything out, and Arianna with her extensive police training puts her two cents in. Doesn't she have alcohol and chowder to serve or something? Again, Rafe notices that the case is personal. Side note: Why does the FBI agent have more scenes/lines that Lexie and Abe ever do?

EJ shows up to see Anna packing. Anna makes jokes about how Sami has him whipped. EJ ADMITS he cannot leave his precious Samantha. Anna wants to faint because it took him FIVE months to admit that.

Daniel wants Maggie to see a doctor.....did he forget what he does for a living? Maggie says she looked up on the Internet it could be related to stress. Who taught Maggie to use the Internet? WHOA. Daniel forces her ugly jacket on her and he takes her to the hospital.

Arianna thinks Rafe is being paranoid. I think Rafe needs to smoke a joint and relax a little bit. It's CLEAR now this was all a setup to hurt Sami. Her baby was kidnapped, and after hours and hours of thinking Rafe realizes that this ALL was to hurt Sami. OMG DUH!

Sami tells Brady how she lied to Rafe, but that it was all okay since Sydney is finally back. The DUMBEST person on the show actually has to tell her....NO lying is never okay.

Chloe walks in to visit Nicole. Anyone else wait for "Love Lift Us Up Where We Belonggg" to start playing? They share a hug and the prison guard steps in before they can get their mack on!! RUDE! Chloe tells Nicole that Sydney is okay.

Anna does her "I told you so" dance. EJ pulls the Mother of My Children card. LAME. He loves torturing Sami....which for EJ translates into I LOVE SAMI.

Daniel gets Maggie an appointment with a specialist. He then stops by Melanie's room to watch her sleep. She wakes up and asks how long he was standing there. He says a couple of minutes...which was actually a COMPLETE LIE. He walked in and she woke up within seconds. He should go to jail with Carly for lying to her too. Melanie comments on how she is a dropout and her parents are doctors. Daniel sucks up and tells her she was the best nurse he ever saw on the entire planet. What a Bullshit artist!

Nicole wants the DEETS from Chloe, but of course no one knows who kidnapped Sydney. Nicole is jealous that Sami and EJ now have everything they want. Nicole needs a jail break immediately so she can ruin EJ's life.

Arianna tells Rafe that Brady proposed and she turned him down. Arianna blames in on being a Hernandez. So even they hate themselves so much! She wants him to not screw things up with Sami......Screwing things Up is what Rafe majored in!

Brady has a man crush on Rafe now.....move over Daniel. He tells Sami how much better Rafe is than EJ. Brady should clearly be the person you take love advice from in this town.

EJ says he will be Samantha's hero....I hope he gets to wear a cape. Anna points out that Sami will turn to EJ when he breaks up her relationship with Rafe. Really there was no reason to point all this out again.

Maggie has her medication adjusted.....not her wig. She goes to visit Melanie, who is SUPER EXCITED to see her Aunt Maggie. She looks at the flowers Philip bought Melanie and drops the vase on the floor. She has a freak out and Melanie is wondering what's wrong.......especially since it's Melanie's job to have the freak outs on the show.

EJ tells Anna in not so many words to get the hell out of Salem. What a rude way to treat your sister-in-law and the lady who helped you kidnap your child! Have some class!

In the most pointless scene of the entire show. The FBI Agent and Arianna talk to Rafe and he ignores the both of them completely. The scene actually emphasized the fact that Rafe has the attention span of a two year old and that he might have been a caveman in another life.

Sami plans a field trip to the Police station to see Rafe. Why would Sydney want to go there, and can this baby have some fun for a change? Take her to the PARK!

Maggie tells Melanie that her MG is back, but that she will be fine. Melanie looks worried because she cannot lose Maggie, way to be selfish!! Maggie promises she is not going anywhere....again that is a LIE! Does Maggie have Stefano powers that we are unaware of??

Brady goes to the hospital to see Melanie. He decides to leave and tells Daniel he is going to propose to his girlfriend. He was actually letting Daniel down easy and telling him "listen I kinda have to marry this hard feelings." Love how Brady listened to what Arianna told him...greattttt listening skills.

EJ and Ari talk about Rafe, Sydney, and life. They are sooooooo going to have an affair, it's totally coming.

Nicole has flashbacks to the bad wig and ugly shoes.......they were both that scary. She cannot remember anything about the kidnapping. Totally because that wig was on too tight.

Sami shows up without Sydney, who she left with Caroline. So your child was just returned to you, you make a HUGE speech about not letting her out of your sight, you claim you want to make up for lost you DITCH HER WITH GRAMS??!! She talks to Rafe, but he just ignores her.....about time, and Sami looks annoyed!

Anna leaves.....and the ugly boots get their own close up as they are left behind!!

Previews: Daniel visits Victor and tells him everything. So, Daniel wants parenting advice from VICTOR of all people? Hopefully they share Carly stories. Daniel will talk about the lack of condom he wore and Victor can mention all those fun times of trying to trick Carly into bed.

Chloe and Nicole still talking. Nicole seems to want out of prison. Maybe Chloe busts her out under her dress....clearly no lesbian jokes here. Then Nicole can hide in the trunk of her car. Bottom Line: Nicole need to be back in Salem like NOW.

Sami tells Rafe she wants back every minute she missed with Sydney.....yet, she left her with her Grandmother. Lovely, how Sami ditched the baby the first chance she got....where is her mother of the year award?

1 comment:

  1. These recaps are HYSTERICAL! I come by every day before I actually watch the show. Right on!!


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